How ‘Super El Niño’ might affect the NHL Stanley Cup Playoffs, based on mascots (sorry, Hurricanes…)
Scott Sistek 
NASA image of a hurricane as seen from International Space Station
Seems these days there’s gobs of stories about how “Super El Niño” will add chaos to the planet this year — drought this, megaflood that, burn the record books down, etc…
This story has… none of that. Instead, with the NHL’s Stanley Cup playoffs starting this weekend, I instead did some in-depth expert analysis of how Super El Niño could have a profound impact on… playoff hockey matchups, based on the teams’ mascots.
Will Super El Niño sink your team’s chances of hoisting Lord Stanley’s Cup? Or will it give it an unexpected atmospheric boost?
Let’s start in the West:
Colorado Avalanche vs. Los Angeles Kings:
What’s the first ingredient needed to have an avalanche? That would be snow. What’s totally missing from all the mountains right now? That would also be snow.
Sorry, Colorado, but Super El Niño’s warming powers are more of a threat than anything the Kings’ Adrian Kempe or Artemi Panarin will throw your way. And I’m pretty sure castles are pretty climate proof, though their moats might run dry.
Advantage: Kings
Dallas Stars vs Minnesota Wild:
Super El Niño tends to aim the jet stream across the South, making for stormier conditions there. Thus, it’s going to be awfully hard to see any Stars when it’s cloudy all the time.
Meanwhile, the north typically ends up warmer and drier. Maybe Super El Niño could make it so warm, that birds just ditch that whole tiring migration south and the rest of the wildlife skips hibernation for once. A Wild party for sure… you betcha!
Advantage: Wild.
Las Vegas Golden Knights vs. Utah Mammoth:
If there’s one thing a popular animated movie series taught us, it’s that Mammoth love a good Ice Age. Super El Niño or not, we’re already decided that we’re steering our planet in the other direction, and forecasts are this Super El Niño will contribute to 2026 becoming the hottest year on record for Earth, only to probably be broken again in 2027.
Vegas does get dinged here too — the last thing someone dressed in a full rust-prone outfit wants is more rain in the South, but for you it’s an inconvenience. For Mammoth it’s… a bit more dire.
Advantage: Knights (but a low scoring series…)
Edmonton Oilers vs Anaheim Ducks:
Not sure Oilers would have any issues with climate shenanigans… but a Super El Niño in Southern California would mean a sudden buyer’s market for Ducks looking for an affordable upgrade in the local real estate market. Persistent rain storms will flood the region’s inventory with new construction of puddles and lakes! (You can even have them put the mortgage on your bill!)
And a happy, well-rested Ducks team is a happy, well-rested goal scoring machine.
Advantage: Ducks, and pray for Edmonton’s goalies.
EASTERN CONFERENCE:
Buffalo Sabres vs Boston Bruins:
The Buffalo Sabres make the playoffs about as often as a Super El Niño comes along, which is to say, it’s rare enough that the media makes a really big deal about it when it finally happens. So they’re kindred spirits!
Meanwhile, extra Super El-Nino-ey warmth for Bruins means shorter winters and in turn, shorter hibernations. I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty cranky and sluggish when I don’t get my full nap.
Advantage: Sabres. (And get Jeremy Swayman some coffee…)
Pittsburgh Penguins vs Philadelphia Flyers:
Much like the Mammoth, Penguins aren’t exactly going to be thrilled with a warm boost to the climate. Their home is already shrinking enough as is due to rapid ice melt. Unlike the Ducks who will suddenly be flush with housing options, Penguins will likely be distracted trying to avoid sudden evacuations.
I really don’t know what a Flyer is, and it seems no one else in Philadelphia does either. Maybe it’s whatever Gritty is supposed to be.
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Super El Niño may turn out to be a nightmare for some, much like Gritty is for many already. So… let’s call it an extra advantage.
Advantage: Flyers. In a sweep.
Carolina Hurricanes vs. Ottawa Senators:
Oooh, so did Ottawa luck into this series matchup, or what? Super El Niño’s tend to suppress the Atlantic hurricane season due to atmospheric pattern shifts that typically lead to extra wind shear. In other words, this is a bad time to be a hurricane.
That said, the opposite is true in the Pacific Ocean and hurricane season there is usually enhanced due to a corresponding lack of wind shear. But last I checked, they are the Carolina Hurricanes and not the San Diego Hurricanes so… womp womp.
Then again, Senators are not exactly the most fearsome mascot even in the best of times. Unlike a fierce wind, I think their main weapon is procedural banter.
I suspect a lot of 0-0 games through regulation, with Senators prevailing on Canada’s Speaker of the Senate casting the tie-breaking vote.
Advantage: Senators.
Tampa Bay Lightning vs. Montreal Canadiens:
We saved the most supercharged series for last.
Super El Niño years tend to bring an increase in precipitation to the South. And for Florida, it’s pretty much written in climate law that any Florida storm has to be a thunderstorm. So Lightning will be aplenty across the “Sunshine” State —even moreso than usual, it seems, and they will ride this super-charged phenomena to power them into the next round.
However, I suspect the Canadiens will make it a series. Super El Niño won’t suddenly turn a Canadian’s typical chill into North Florida, but maybe this year they don’t need the extra hassle to snowbird their way south into the budding Florida thunderstorm-a-palooza, and maybe there’s less snow shoveling to boot.
Much like the Ducks, a rested Canadian is a happy Canadian and now they won’t ever have to stray far from their beloved Tim Hortons for daily fuel.
Advantage: Lightning, but the series goes 7.
WHO’S GOING TO WIN THE WHOLE THING?
I think once the Lightning outlast the Canadiens it’l be smooth sailing to hoist the Stanley Cup over the Ducks, who will be sad to lose the Cup but have the consolation prize of a much nicer pad to come home to.
What did the Seattle Kraken miss by not making the playoff cut?
Super El Niños mean much warmer than average ocean temperatures.
I admit I haven’t seen the research yet on whether a Kraken would thrive or wilt under warmer water temps, though they might end up a bit hungrier as mariner castaways that would normally become their daily lunch would have a better chance of staving off hypothermia a bit longer…
MORE TO EXPLORE:
- What would a ‘Super’ El Niño mean for Seattle and the Pacific Northwest?
- Watch: Rare waterspout sighted off the shores of Seattle over Puget Sound
- I watched Netflix’s new “Thrash” movie so you don’t have to